Greenpeace and Muffies

I work in Ballston (for those non-DCers, it's a neighborhood in Arlington) right near the metro stop and the mall. Greenpeace always has people on the streets stopping people for petitions or fund raising or whatever they're doing. I occasionally change my walking route to avoid these people. But not often. They usually try to stop you with something like, "Do you have some time for the environment?" Or "Do you care about the environment?" You get the point. My problem is that I usually break into a big grin when I see these kids. They misinterpret that as my joy at wanting to stop to answer questions or do whatever they're doing. The reality is that I'm usually thinking of what I consider funny responses when they try to stop me. I usually just say, "No time right now." A question for the masses though: Is it inappropriate to simply respond with a deadpan, "Fuck the environment."? That's what I really want to do. Or if they say, "Do you care about the environment?", can't I just say, "Ummm, noooooo. Not really." I wouldn't do that though because I do indeed care about the environment. Hell, I just reused a ziploc bag today! AND I didn't burn any styrofoam with an aerosol can of Aquanet and a match. So I get a reward!

And to that end, I did indeed get a reward for myself. I had the yen for a little treat of the pastry nature. Generally if I feel like I want a cakey type of treat, I'll get something in the carrot or red velvet cake family if I can find a suitable offering. I also enjoy anything in the pumpkin group. Serendipity was with me on that front because I happened to walk into Panera Bread to see their offerings and imagine my surprise when I spied something called the Pumpkin Muffie! Admittedly though, I did not enjoy actually asking for a "pumpkin muffie." What a horrid name. The product was kind of like the top of a muffin (all cake, no stump. Similar to Elaines' idea in Seinfeld). It was OK I guess. Nothing to write home about though. Just OK. Then I took a brief walk and got a cup of coffee because Panera's coffee is OK, but not great.

Oh yeah. Now for the stupid cold

So I've been figuring that I'd get sick for a while. I don't think it's possible to go an entire season without catching a cold at some point. As usual, I've been putting my faith in Airborne, or its cheaper generic equivalent if need be. I don't know if this stuff does anything, but I sometimes take it anyway. Last Thursday I finally succumbed to the sick that has been floating around everywhere. I even had a fever for the first time in I don't know how long. I'm on the mend now, but still not top notch. For those of you who don't know, Airborne has been ordered to pay $27 million in a class-action lawsuit. If you've taken the stuff, you can get a piece of the pie. Visit here for details.

And on the topic of colds and sickness, will you idiots please stay home when you're deep into it?? For the love of Christ. Not a single one of you out there has a job that is so important that you can't miss a day or two of work. (In your mind you might, but in reality you don't.) Think of it as a little holiday with NyQuil hallucinations to sweeten the deal. And if you are going to go to work, cover your fucking mouth when you cough and/or sneeze. Seriously. I am so sick of assholes out there coughing and hacking and blowing snots with their yaps wide open. What's the matter, hands too full of coffee and iPods? Tough. Cover your mouth, you swine. Otherwise, I will blame you explicity when we have some kind of epidemic.

And my apologies to those of you who do cover up. I get really cranky when I'm sick and need to school the idiots.

Stupid cold. Stupid drivers

I've been waylaid for a little while with a nasty ass cold/flu hybrid that's been floating around. I knew it was inevitable that I'd get sick, so I'm not surprised. I'll get to more about that shortly.

First, I'd like to say thanks to the ignorant beotch who almost sideswiped me this morning causing me to skid on rocks and dirt and then ram into a curb. Pardon my French, but you are a stupid shit. Here are a couple of things you should understand about driving in the U.S.

1. A green light means that I can go when I'm supposed to go. It is not a pretty color to look at. I may be mistaken, but I'm guessing that green means go in China too, and red means stop there too. And that red means you should stop and/or yield to the huge flow of oncoming traffic.
2. When somebody is laying on their horn because you are obliviously going into their lane, that means maybe you should take your head out of your ass long enough to check around you to see what the ruckus is all about.
3. When you nearly cause an accident and somebody has hit something (luckily only a curb this time), you should probably stop in case there is damage. I have no idea if there is a law to this, but maybe it falls under some kind of hit and run umbrella law.

Luckily, there was no damage. Of course as luck has it, I recently got new tires which were very expensive. I'm grateful that they're made of Kevlar. Maybe that helped prevent a blowout or cracked rim. I don't believe I ever saw somebody as oblivious as this lady was this morning. She just continued driving into my lane with no signal, no looking, nothing. I'm grateful that my cool head prevailed and I didn't uselessly chase her down to scream at her (that never accomplishes anything). As luck had it, she was going in the same direction as me, so I was able to catch up to get her license plate number in the event of damage. I can't tell if she recognized my vehicle as the one she nearly hit, but I'm happy that she appeared to have a bit of fear in her face.

And so, to the lady in the gray Toyota Corolla, Virginia tag # KGC 8842, I would like to say FUCK YOU! You should not be allowed behind a Big Wheel.

Bear and Fog City

"You could say I became chronologically "fucked-up"."

The Tragically Hip "Locked in the Trunk of A Car"

Blogs are supposed to be written in real-time. But that’s not always possible, so here is a story that was written (mostly) on February 8. But I’m posting it on February 19. Oh well. Time is tight. And if you’re confused now, get ready because the next post will be going back to February 4. So keep up, will you?

It’3:58 AM PST in San Francisco. The city is blanketed in fog and I can hear the foghorn sounding in the Bay every twenty seconds. This much I know for sure. I should know as we just got home about 20 minutes ago. The night began with dinner with my friends Pappy (you can see his picture in the Boston story below) and Kelly. We went to Q, a solid little hipster restaurant in Richmond that reminded me a lot of Philly. I had fried chicken with tater tots and roasted veggies. And country gravy that I’d love a shot of right now. My friends live in the Haight. After dinner we dropped Kelly off at home (hey, some people have to work) and me and Pappy headed to Haight St. to figure it all out. The first stop was Alembic, which is owned by the same folks who own Magnolia, a great organic brew pub up the road. I had the Kalifornia Kolsch, which was served in a small glass because it’s supposed to be enjoyed cold. Next stop was Martin Macks, a nice dive that apparently used to smell more like vomit a little while ago. No worries because it sure smelled like piss in the johnny. The juke was solid and we waxed political while taking care of some Newcastle Browns. After a while we went across the street to the Gold Cane. The bartender sported a white beard and we all had a chuckle that the three of us wore beards. As we ordered a bear, I noticed Bear on the other side of the bar.

But I didn’t know it was Bear yet. So let’s track back. My conference (the reason I was in SF) ended around 4:00, so I decided to wander around Union Square and do some shopping for a bit. After that bag of fun, I got a snack and took a seat in Union Square. A fellow who can only be described as “true San Fran hippy” sat down nearby with a bite to eat. A busker was belting out a long tune on a bagpipe somewhere nearby and was really going to town. After an eternity he finally finished. The hippy said something to the effect of, “Jesus, that guy has a lot of wind.” So that got us talking about whatever. I told him that I was staying in the Haight and he said that’s where he lives and a good place to see is the Golden Cane, where you can hang out in the back and smoke pancakes. A new term to say the least, but it cracked him up, so who am I to disagree. So that is how I met Bear, although as I stated, I didn’t know he was Bear yet.

When we did get to the Gold Cane, he remembered me—no small feat considering his condition. The ol’ boy was completely boffo. To give you a picture of this guy, he was probably 5’10, 230 lbs (with a pronounced gut), long curly hair held back with a bandana. He also wore a few tshirts, suspenders, vest, and a leather jacket that had various buttons and military pins on it. A site to behold. When the bartender began to kick us out at 2:00, the regulars were attempting to get ol Bear to leave because he sure as hell didn’t want to. He wasn’t mean, he was just loud and loved to tell rude stories. A guy I could get behind to say the least. My last sight of Bear before we left was him blowing out some candles from the bar and putting them in his pockets. It’s not like they were special candles or something. I don’t think I ever saw someone steal a candle that was likely still dripping in wax, but so be it. And that brings us full circle to the foghorn.

Greetings from God's Waiting Room!

So I'm here in Fort Walton Beach, Florida to attend a work meeting at Eglin Air Force Base (the photo is an aerial of the area). I get to go spend the next two days learning about Web content migration and content management. For February, the weather should be warmer, but apparently a cold snap came through. Well, I guess 60 degrees isn’t so bad, but 60s at night would be really sweet. I haven’t been to Florida in a really long time, so it’s kind of nice to be here I guess, although my time will be spent in conferences all day.

After I checked in and got myself organized I decided to head out for dinner. I looked online to see what is near my hotel (which is actually right on the beach) and found a place called Old Bay Steamers. There were many positive reviews, and it was nearby, so I figured I'd give it a shot. After missing the restaurant and ending up in what was apparently the strip club zone, I found it after a few turn arounds. Being a true jackass, I'm not mature enough to go to a place called Old Bay Steamers and not make a million jokes in my head about the Cleveland Steamer. The fare was all types of steamed crustaceans and shellfish and whatnot (no fried crap, as their motto goes), so I was pretty psyched. I opted for the "Little Steamer". Again, I was barely able to order without laughing. Jokes aside, the meal was incredible. For $22 you get mussels, clams, oysters, whole red shrimp, snow crabs, corn on the cob, potatoes, and salad. And you got a lot of everything! It was typical steamed seafood with some butter, lemon, and Old Bay-like seasoning on the shrimp. Mmmm, it hit the spot. It reminded me of the typical steamed meal you get in the Outer Banks. Old Bay Steamers also went to a new level by giving a pair of kitchen shears to open your food. Damn that worked well! I also got a slice of key lime pie to go. Mmmmm. Limey.

A funny thing happened at dinner. I brought a book called Wikinomics with me so I could do some homework while eating (it’s my technique to not feel like a loser while eating alone). The staff was beginning to clean up and there were only a few people still eating. The hostess was sitting a few stools away from me eating dinner as well. She asked me what I was reading and I told her, “Wikinomics”. She asked me what it was about and I told her that it’s about various Web 2.0 applications and how they are affecting business. She laughed and said, “Ohhhhh. I thought you said ‘wicca’, like those people who practice witchcraft as a religion.” I said, “Nooo, wiki like Wikipedia.” Then we laughed and I had my last crab leg and left. Yeah, that was a good time.

And so (wait, scrap what I said above about not being in Florida in a long time. I was just in South Beach last year around this time). . . And so, I'm hoping that tomorrow I have a chance to see the ocean tomorrow. Well, the Gulf, which is still the ocean. But you get the point.

Free Flat Earth Veggie Crisps

Go to http://www.flatearth.com/ to print our a coupon for a free bag of their baked veggie crisps. I've had them before and they're a pretty tasty snack. Free is even better.

Kate Nash--I'm diggin' her sound

Comparisons are inevitable when discussing musicians. One band or singer inspires another and so on down the line. (Even an “original” has to find inspiration somewhere.) What then of one of my new favorite addictions? Well, as all the media is saying, and anyone with ears can tell, Kate Nash will have to be compared to Lily Allen. Of course, that is solid company to keep. It’s kind of an odd notion that two contemporaries would be compared, but that’s how it goes. And I’m not saying that one inspired the other, just that they’re similar.

What’s their sound? Poppy, good stories, simple melodies. Lily Allen is more cheeky than Kate Nash. Kate sings with a bit more conviction in a narrative voice. One thing that is noticeable from both singers is that you can actually hear their English accents, which makes their songs very distinctive. Think about how many Brits lose their accent (unless you really strain to hear it) when they sing. Can Kate and Lily both have been cut from the same cloth as The Slits (which is one of the first female Brit bands that jumps in my mind)? Not likely because The Slits were more on the ska/punk fusion end of things. Two other female English singers that hit it big in recent years were Lady Sovereign and M.I.A. And yes, I’m aware that M.I.A. is from Sri Lanka, but she is so via London. But those two can’t be confused with the singer/songwriter sensibility of Kate Nash and Lily Allen. They both rocked out in the hip hop style, with a touch of garage.

Kate Nash’s sound reminds me more of a poppier Kasey Chambers (Australian). The guitar has a solid bit of jangle to it and it’ll get your toe tappin. Kate also has some tunes that sound like they’re straight from the disco, or could turn into a nice disco remix. (Remember, discotheques are still popular in Europe.)

Anyway, just do yourself a favor and check out this video that has a medley of her songs from her album “Made of Bricks”. Have a listen and see what you think.